the gifts of connecting
by Elisa
Sharing our authentic selves with others can be vulnerable and exposing. It is also the most joyous, fulfilling and important thing that we do as humans.
Each day we meet, talk and connect with other people. This involves sharing something of ourselves. Many daily interactions can seem pretty superficial, transactional and fleeting but there is still an impact from the meeting of two personalities and energies. So, what about the interactions with people who we see every day and who we have combined our lives with? Familiarity can suggest a deeper knowledge and understanding of each other than the superficial meetings, but seeing someone on a daily basis can make us blind to subtle changes as life shapes and changes them.
…is your invitation to spend time together as a couple learning simple everyday practices to refresh the wonder and joy in noticing, appreciating and being with each other.
Have you ever wondered what creates and sustains a ‘good connection’ with someone? Why is it that a magical and mutual feeling of curiosity, recognition and understanding occurs with some people and not others? How the magic happens is a beautiful mystery but nurturing
and tending to a special connection, giving it importance and priority, is something we have knowledge about and can learn to do.
Authenticity and showing upDeep connections, like soul friends, lovers and partners, are precious people in our lives. These are connections that we can rest in and where we can truly be our authentic selves. These special ones don’t need pretence or impressing – they just need us to show up and be ‘real’ with them. In this way they support our growth and experience of life by being there when we need comfort or to express and feel. And in return we do the same for them. The symbiosis of connection means there is mutual support of each other’s experience and expansion as we move through life together. In this parallel journey we both give and receive more feeling, more pleasure, more aliveness! Retaining and nurturing these relationships is vitally important for our wellbeing. Without these deeply profound relationships most of us would feel unseen, unheard – isolated.
Courage in expression
How much of yourself and your needs and desires do you keep comfortably hidden? Or are you fiercely courageous when it comes to sharing your inner world with your connections?
Asking for what we want and need can be difficult, especially if we are generally a care provider or if were brought up to put others first. Asking for what we need is sometimes considered an indulgence, but in truth it is an essential component of mental and emotional wellbeing that allows us to forge meaningful relationships that help to meet our basic needs. To reveal what we need takes courage because exposing our innermost thoughts opens us up to the possibility of being rejected or held in judgement. The fear of rejection leads many to present the world with a sanitised and ‘acceptable’ version of themselves, never truly embodying their essential nature.
The gift of deep and authentic connections is an agreement that we will hold each other’s vulnerability with skill, love and integrity. This doesn’t necessarily mean that we will get all that we ask for, but it does mean that there is a trusted bond in which new ideas can be explored and enquiry can be supported.
Meeting new versions of you and me
When you ask the question, ‘what do you need today?’, or ‘what do you want to express right now?’, are you clear on why you are asking?
Asking the question is an indication to the other that you are ready and available to listen and carries an invitation to step into a space of sharing and vulnerability. However, if you have brought your own agenda to the conversation and are looking for a certain response, then your expectations about the interaction are predefined. Understanding how to hold space by dropping your agenda and expectations is fundamental to deepening into trusted intimacy.
Revealing what lights us up, brings us joy and opens us to sensuality and aliveness, are all deeply intimate and sacred parts that we don’t reveal to just anyone. When we feel safe and trust in a genuine and deeply connected relationship we feel safer to divulge our deepest yearnings and hidden places. These hidden places are the gold. They are not just the result of the meeting of two bodies and intellects, but the point where two spirits converge and embark on a journey of deeper understanding and adventure.
Connection is about accepting what we find in ourselves and in those we journey through life with. It’s about approaching the other with an open heart, genuine curiosity and compassion for their vulnerability. Experiencing even deeper intimacy is available to everyone through the willingness to stay open, keep learning, and loving fiercely with curiosity and joy.
Reflexology treatments promote the body’s natural ability to heal. Each of the body’s systems are mapped out on the soles of the feet and a session involves following this map to ensure each system is addressed in turn, creating a sense of equilibrium within the body.
A reiki session provides a sense of balance by aligning the subtle energy body and provides a deep sense of connection to ourselves, often allowing access to knowledge of the deepest needs and desires of our soul, which can be assistive during the process of getting clear on our priorities for 2025.
Elisa is a fully qualified and insured holistic therapist; she gained her diploma of reflexology in 2003 and was recognised as a reiki master / teacher in 2009. Elisa has gained extensive experience from working with a range of patient groups, including developing a specialism in palliative care.
